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God Was in This Place and I, I Did Not Know: Finding Self, Spirituality and Ultimate Meaning

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Title: God Was in This Place and I, I Did Not Know: Finding Self, Spirituality and Ultimate Meaning
by Lawrence Kushner
ISBN: 1879045338
Publisher: Jewish Lights Pub
Pub. Date: April, 1993
Format: Paperback
Volumes: 1
List Price(USD): $16.95
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Average Customer Rating: 4.75

Customer Reviews

Rating: 5
Summary: Climbing the rungs
Comment: The title of this book, 'God was in the Place, & I, i Did not Know', may seem a bit cumbersome (and even, to some, looks like it has a typographical error. However, Rabbi Lawrence Kushner draws this title from the Torah, the book of Genesis to be precise. It is the exclamation of Jacob who, upon waking from his dream about the ladder connecting heaven and earth, makes a startling realisation about the reality of the seemingly mundane and ordinary place where he had stopped for the night.

In the prologue, Kushner develops an exegesis and hermeneutic of Genesis 28:16 more fully, and in so doing, illustrates many of the problems we regularly encounter, both in reading scripture as well as in interpreting daily life experience. He places this story in strong connection with the ordinary, even relating the angels on the ladder to common humanity:

'There is another, even more obvious interpretation. The angels did not reside in heaven at all. They lived on earth. They were ordinary human beings. And, like ordinary human beings, they shuttled back and forth between heaven and earth. The trick is to remember, after you descend, what you understood when you were high on the ladder.'

Kushner examines the way in which sages have interpreted this passage, and provides insights into history, psychology, philosophy, and scriptural study in the process. Each interpretation has had what one might call a personal conversation and experience with Jacob. In fact, each of these interpreters is portrayed as being on the ladder, rising and descending. The text is structured in this way. The interpreters are:

+Rashi
Schelomo ben Yitzhaki, Rashi
The key word for this interpretation is awareness. This is very important for making the kind of realisation that Jacob made. It is very important for us as we perceive the presence of God in our own lives.
If I had known God was here, I wouldn't have gone to sleep.

+Kotzk
Menachem Mendl of Kotzk
The key concept here is egotism. Only by stripping away the ego can one begin to understand the presence and the personality of God.
God was here because I was able to subdue my ego.

+Ludomir
Hannah Rachel Werbermacher, the Maid of Ludomir
A remarkable woman, a teacher of the Hasidim (who listened to her teaching through a half-open door, so as to preserve distance, and perhaps preserve a fiction that they were not in fact being taught by a woman), whose insight gave her access to the other side, or the many other sides, of stories being considered.
God is present, even in the midst of evil.

+Mezritch
Dov Baer, the Maggid of Mezritch
The word Maggid means 'storyteller'. Through the stories, here the key is self-reflection, to find meaning in the innermost being, to find that still, small voice that can only speak in silence and the absence of our own activity.
God was here because I stopped being aware of myself.

+Nachmani
Shmuel bar Machmani
Who was Jacob, and why should he know this? Who is God, and why should God do this? These are questions that are historical as much as theological or psychological, and it is in our history and God's history that we find meaning and identity.
I could have climbed this ladder of history.

+De Leon
Moses ben Shem Tov de Leon
A remarkable book, lost for a time, whose existence was denied even by Moses de Leon's widow, the Zohar, gives astonishing insight into the interior of God, reality, and our selves, and how to find a deep connection that is always present and never finished. Attributed to another author, Shimon bar Yohai, Kushner speculates that perhaps they shared the same soul. The completeness of the self of the universe connects through Jacob's story here.
I is the Lord your God

+Ostropol
Shimshon ben Pesach Ostropoler
Beyond the question and awareness of the self of God and the self of the universe is the self, basic and simple, complex and intricate. Rabbi Shimshon put names to the kelipot, the broken shards of creation. We are all a part of a whole, a broken piece in and of ourselves. Our awareness of this helps begin the process of reunion.
I didn't know that my name was part of God's name

Each interpreter's chapter stands on its own merits, but each is connected to the other, and to a wider body of interpretation and scholarship, by the use of side notes and references done in (what I would describe as being) a proto-talmudic structure. The Talmud has been described by some as one of the world's first hypertexts, with cross-links and chains that lead through the text -- this book does similar linking.

Rabbi Kushner concludes by linking all the stories to the reader:

'Each person has a Torah, unique to that person, his or her innermost teaching. Some seem to know their Torahs very early in life and speak and sing them in a myriad of ways. Others spend their whole lives stammering, shaping and rehearsing them. Some are long, some are short. Some are intricate and poetic, others are only a few words, and still others can only be spoken through gesture and example. But every soul has a Torah.'

The relative place of self (both as an I and as an i) in God's life and universe becomes more apparent through these stories. Human beings are important, yet who can be important in relation to God? Yet, who is not important in relation to God? May this work help you discern where God is in your life, and what you are called to be.

Rating: 5
Summary: The hand of God
Comment: As you have gathered from the main review, this book focuses on the meaning of just one verse in Genesis, when Jacob awoke from the ladder dream. Usually Rabbis pick up on a verse just a couple verses back where "the Angels of God were going up and down the ladder". The focus is that they start on Earth and go to Heaven - not the other way around.

This book is great because it is like there is a dialog accross the space-time continuumn with 7 Rabbis in different locations and centuries arguing about their 7 different interpretations.

One interpretation based on the fact that there are two "I's" in the verse spelled differently in Hebrew. It is that my Godlike "I" did not know God was present because my ego "i" was in the way. Jacob's chance to experience God was diminished because the ego "i" was ragiling off its commentary. This concept is similar to Buddism.

Kushner adds an 8th interpretaion in his prolouge - which I won't spoil by going into detail. I heard Kushner talk at a Synagouge in Austin, Texas and he summarized his interpretation by finishing, "Hold up your hands before your eyes. You are looking at the hands of God."

A great book on modern Jewish mystism.

Rating: 4
Summary: Big Ideas, Small Book
Comment: The only problem I had with this book was that it seemed to brush over some big ideas. Things would be stated that the author seemed to assume the reader would agree with without delving further into it. But I would still reccomend this book, because it's a great example of the many meanings that can be found in the Torah -- even in just one verse!

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