Order from a Major Online Bookstore
Ultimate Book Price Comparison Engine
Save Your Time And Money
| AnyBook4Less.com | Order from a Major Online Bookstore |
|
| Home | Store List | FAQ | Contact Us | | ||
| Ultimate Book Price Comparison Engine Save Your Time And Money |
||
 |
Title: The Secret of Overcoming Verbal Abuse: Getting Off the Emotional Roller Coaster and Regaining Control of Your Life by Albert Ellis, Marcia Grad Powers ISBN: 0-87980-445-9 Publisher: Wilshire Book Co Pub. Date: October, 2000 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $12.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 3.8 (10 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: Exactly what I needed...but
Comment: I wouldn't recommend this as a first book to read about verbal abuse. For me, it was a real catalyst for change, but probably would NOT have been if I hadn't a) been in therapy for a while and b)first read a lot of other books, especially books by Cheri Huber, a buddhist teacher with very similar ideas. 100% responsibility for your experience, 100% of the time.
I agree, it is hard to swallow the idea that an abuser has the 'right' to abuse, but really it is true, but not in a specific way, like the way that we have a right to free speech. It is broader than that, and I think is intended more to shift your attention away from what the abuser is doing and instead focus on YOURSELF. I can't explain it, but it has to do with the abuser sowing his own seeds.
I think this is a very powerful book, but also very easy to misinterpret. Save this one for more advanced recovery work.
Rating: 5
Summary: Personal Responsibility
Comment: Although the material by Patricia Evans is an invaluable tool that assists with identifying abuse, validating the victim's perception, and includes exercises that teach the victim how to respond to the abuser in a healthy manner - little if nothing is discussed on personal responsibility. Over time if there is nothing other than consistent emphasis on blaming the abuser and receiving endless support and sympathy for the victim, this would be defined as "enabling" which can result in stagnation for the victim. Some victims get "stuck" and need a resource to help extricate themselves from the cycle of abuse. Finally, a book that delves into the victim's issues! The best method in which to alleviate abuse in one's life (in addition to recognizing verbal abuse for what it is) is to have self-insight, a healthy self-esteem, boundary setting abilities, et al. The Secret of Overcoming Verbal Abuse: Getting Off the Emotional Roller Coaster and Regaining Control of Your Life contains the pervasive message that one does not HAVE to be a victim, and includes concrete steps one can take in order to be a victim no more. I found it so helpful, I am ordering a copy for a friend :)
Rating: 5
Summary: If "something" is not right with your man - READ THIS BOOK
Comment: I am a male.
I bought this book out of general interest, because I like Albert Ellis's books. This book answered one specific question for me. It had been puzzling me for a year and a half. Namely, why on earth did this woman who I cared for, keep rejecting me and going back to her old boyfriend who treated her like garbage, and occasionally struck her?
(Answer: Abuse creates strong feelings, which some women mistake for love).
I've had occasion to pass this book to a few female friends who I thought needed it, and to one who I knew didn't. The latter, who never takes any rubbish from anybody, found it a fascinating read - as it explained to her behaviour she observed in some men and women.
The beginning chapters outline what constitutes verbal abusive behaviour, and gives numerous examples.
One of the my female friends stated that it was an eerie experience, reading in point form, almost an exact script of what life with her ex husband had been like for the previous 20 years.
My other abused friend said, "Yes it's all true - except for the part about saying sorry - he never said that".
I can only draw one conclusion:
If you have a niggly feeling that things aren't quite right with either your new Prince Charming, or with the one who used to be Prince Charming - before you married him - you had better read this book.
Else you may waste 10 or 20 years on someone who, you will ultimately and grimly be forced to admit to yourself, never actually loved you. He was incapable of it from the beginning.
The techniques for dealing with abusive relationships are given in the later chapters. They are standard Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy methods. They won't let you get away with a "Poor me, why did this have to happen to me?" type attitude.
Ultimately, you only get the behaviour that you tolerate.
If you are one of the unfortunate women stuck in this situation, you can at least take some solace - the book points out that you are not alone. Thousands of women are in a similar situation.
 |
Title: The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond by Patricia Evans ISBN: 1558505822 Publisher: Adams Media Corporation Pub. Date: March, 1996 List Price(USD): $10.95 |
 |
Title: Controlling People: How to Recognize, Understand, and Deal With People Who Try to Control You by Patricia Evans ISBN: 158062569X Publisher: Adams Media Corporation Pub. Date: January, 2002 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
 |
Title: The Emotionally Abused Woman : Overcoming Destructive Patterns and Reclaiming Yourself by M.F.C.C. Beverly Engel ISBN: 0449906442 Publisher: Ballantine Books Pub. Date: 21 January, 1992 List Price(USD): $13.50 |
 |
Title: Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out; On relationship and recovery by Patricia Evans ISBN: 1558503048 Publisher: Adams Media Corporation Pub. Date: September, 1993 List Price(USD): $10.95 |
 |
Title: No Visible Wounds : Identifying Non-Physical Abuse of Women by Their Men by Ph.D. Mary Susan Miller ISBN: 0449910792 Publisher: Ballantine Books Pub. Date: 08 October, 1996 List Price(USD): $13.95 |
Thank you for visiting www.AnyBook4Less.com and enjoy your savings!
Copyright� 2001-2021 Send your comments
