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Title: Women Who Think Too Much: How to Break Free of Overthinking and Reclaim Your Life by Susan Nolen-Hoeksema ISBN: 0-8050-7018-4 Publisher: Henry Holt & Company, Inc. Pub. Date: 05 February, 2003 Format: Hardcover Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $24.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 3.86 (7 reviews)
Rating: 1
Summary: Women Who Think Too Much
Comment: This book was very disappointing. Every chapter seems to constantly review the negative people and situations that "women constantly think of" giving examples. On and on with all the negativity, it was depressing. The advice given was what any friend could tell you. There is no new advice, just seems to be a review of everyone's problems and to "do something else", so you don't think about it. I was bored and disappointed, the worst book I've read in a long time. Made me think too much about what a waste of money it was!
Rating: 3
Summary: lots of repetition
Comment: This book will probably be helpful for the average woman with minor problems with overthinking who hasn't as yet identified this as her problem. The book could have been much shorter and said just as much. There is a lot of repetition that will probably prove helpful for women trying to figure out if this is their problem as many synoptic examples of overthinking are given. For others that have read a lot about anxiety etc. it will be less helpful and very repetitive. Most of the strategies will not help those with serious debilitating problems, but may provide relief for women (or men) with occassional bouts of anxiety and overthinking. Methods of distraction and telling oneself to stop are only marginally helpful to those with more serious problems in this area, as if one could stop that easily, presumably one would have done so long ago. This book will mostly help some people to realize they can give themselves permission to stop ruminating. For those who are beyond being helped by that, it offers little more than a bandage. There isn't much scientific information on nuerology outside of a paragraph or two. The rest is mostly anecdotal.
Rating: 5
Summary: Excellent Book On Breaking Free From Overthinking
Comment: Women Who Think Too Much came out earlier this year, and I gobbled it up in two sittings. Several people have borrowed this book from me, and have found it incredibly insightful. (And not all have been women, either!) This book features a breakthrough new method that teaches you how to free yourself from the negative cycles of overthinking.
What is overthinking? Nolen-Hoeksma, a professor of Psychology, contends that our society is both fast-paced and overly-self-analytical. The self-help section in bookstores bulge with upteen ways to analyze yourself and gaze at your bellybutton. With this self-analysis comes over-thinking--and Nolen-Hoeksema has discovered that women are more prone to overthink than men. Women spend countless hours fruitlessly thinking about negative ideas, feelings, experiences, and relationships. The result of this over-thinking? A huge number of women are feeling sad, anxious, or seriously depressed.
The author provides case studies, but they aren't presented in a dry, intellectual tone. She connects the dots between the research and how it impacts women in their day-to-day lives. Chapter titles include What's Wrong With OverThinking?, Married to My Worries: Overthinking Intimate Relationships, Always On The Job: Overthinking Work and Careers, and ten other chapters. The great thing about this book is that it doesn't just talk about why overthinking is bad for mental, emotional, and even physical health, but also provides several chapters on how to break free from overthinking and move to higher ground.
In the Chapter If It Hurts So Much, Why Do We Do It?, the author explains fascinating discoveries in brain science, and how when we think of one bad thing, it usually cascades into a torrent of negative thoughts and emotions. She writes:
"The organization of our brain sets us up for overthinking. Each little thought and memory we hold in our mind does not sit there isolated and independent from other thoughts. Instead, our thoughts are woven together in intricate networks of associations...This intricate organization of the brain into in interconnected networks of memories, thoughts, and feelings greatly increases our efficiency of thinking. It's what helps us see similarities and connections between issues...But our spiderweb of a brain also makes it easy to overthink. In particular, the fact that negative mood connects negative thoughts and memories, even when these thoughts and memories have nothing else to do with one another, sets us up for overthinking. When you are in a bad mood for any reason, your mood activates--literally lights up--those nodes of your brain that hold negative memories from the past and negative ways of thinkings. This makes them highly accessible: it's easier to get there with your conscious thoughts. This is why it is easier to think of negative things when you are in a bad mood than when you are in a good mood. It is also easier to see interconnections between the bad things in your life when you are in a bad mood..."
The author describes three phases of conquering overthinking, and covers each phase in separate chapters: breaking free of its grip, moving to higher ground and gaining a new perspective, and avoiding future traps by building your resources. Not only does she provide example scenarios of how to implement these strategies, but she also has a quick reference section in chart form at the end of each of these chapters. For example:
Strategy Don't go there.
Description Choose not to get involved in situations that arouse overthinking.
Example Jan knew that spending too much time with her mother was sure to result in weeks of overthinking, so she kept her visits short.
Another example:
Strategy Let go of unhealthy goals
Description Let go of goals that are impossible or that cause you to act self-destructively.
Example Briana decided that rather than try to lose 50 pounds by starving herself, she would lose 20 with a diet prescribed by her doctor.
I highly recommend this book for anyone interested in neuro-science and the thought/emotion connection, as well as those looking for pratical strategies to manage negative self-talk and unproductive mental chatter.
Review originally posted at http://SelfDevelopment.BellaOnline.com
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