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How Can I Get Through to You? Closing the Intimacy Gap Between Men and Women

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Title: How Can I Get Through to You? Closing the Intimacy Gap Between Men and Women
by Terrence Real
ISBN: 0-684-86878-4
Publisher: Scribner Book Company
Pub. Date: 24 December, 2002
Format: Paperback
Volumes: 1
List Price(USD): $14.00
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Average Customer Rating: 4.35 (17 reviews)

Customer Reviews

Rating: 5
Summary: THIS BOOK MAY HAVE SAVED MY MARRIAGE!!
Comment: I have read everything out there to try and salvage an eighteen year relationship. I saw myself and my husband on every page of this book. It was amazing. For the first time I understood what was going on and why it has been so hard to talk to each other. I gave this book to my husband and insisted that we read it together and we actually talked about it.
This is the smartest book on couples I have ever read. It explains why so many men and women have so much trouble. It's full of ideas about how to make it better. The stories made me laugh and sometimes even cry, like a good novel. I loved every minute of it. And it's just brimming over with casual comments that are so profound. Like this - "The great paradox of intimacy is that in order to sustain closeness we have to be capable of bearing solitude inside the relationship." Or what Terry calls, "normal marital hatred." There are a million of these. I honestly can say I'd like to see everyone who wants their relationship to work to read this. It should be passed out along with marriage licenses. It is far and away the best thing I have ever found. Thank you!

Rating: 5
Summary: An Absolute MUST READ
Comment: If you are want to save your relationship, or be a powerful couples therapist, read Terrence Real's revolutionary new book How Can I Get Through to You? It is SINGULARLY the wisest, most poetic, book I've ever read about the problems facing couples today. In the clinical setting, I recommend it to every couple who walks through my door, and I enjoy watching the proverbial light bulbs go off as couple begin to see light where previously it was dark. At home, I utilize Real's wisdom daily in my relationship, and both of us are exponentially happier and more fulfilled.

Terrence Real has the skill, and the courage, to look our cultural and therapeutic paradigms in the eye, while turning them on their heads. While most conventional therapies are useful, they are limited in scope. Real's work offers fresh insight to couples and clinicians working with couples, and expands the horizons of the struggles couples face to include the cultural context. By suggesting that intimacy is a daily practice Real empowers couples to live in truth and integrity - and he demands that clinicians do the same. If you read one book this year on couples, make it this one. Not only will it help you navigate your personal, or clinical, world with dignity and joy - it will change your life.

Rating: 5
Summary: On the verge of divorce? Read this first.
Comment: Before you leave an unhappy marriage, you MUST read this book. It helped me understand so many more things about the terrible deadlocks people get into in relationships. I've never read anything like it. With the new way the author helps you "see" the relationship interactions, if you stay you won't be resentful, and if you go, at least you'll know why instead of being lost in a swirl of hurt and anger. Either way, you may feel like you truly understand even your multi-decade marriage for the very first time.

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