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Title: If I'm So Wonderful, Why Am I Still Single? : Ten Strategies That Will Change Your Love Life Forever by Susan Page ISBN: 0-609-80909-1 Publisher: Three Rivers Press Pub. Date: 26 March, 2002 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $13.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.13 (23 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: A break-through book
Comment: Despite a title that makes you want to cover the book in brown paper, I found this book to be one of the most insightful on the subject. It helped me clarify what I'm looking for in a mate and has helped me avoid "Better-Than-Nothing" relationships. I highly recommend it for the recently divorced, as it will help them understand why they married as they did. The subject of hidden ambivalence was the most insightful. Now that I've resolved my own ambivalence, I can usually identify it in others. I especially found the straightforward and pragmatic approach to dating to be results-producing. If every single person read this book, we'd have more well-suited marriages!
Rating: 5
Summary: This Book Really Did Change My Life Life Forever
Comment: After being devastatingly dumped by a guy I thought was "the one," I picked up Susan Page's book. It totally changed the way I looked at dating and relationships. I realized I had been settling for alot less in men than I wanted and alot less than I deserved. I read and reread the book, and became more focused on what qualities I was looking for in a man. I got up the courage to join a dating service and I stuck to the principals in Susan Page's book. After dating for a year, I met a wonderful man that I've happily shared my life with now for five years. Frankly, it wasn't "love at first sight" and because of Ms. Page's book, I quickly recognized that this man had all the qualities I was looking for. I gave it a shot and am glad I did! We have been married for two years and I look forward to our future together. Aside from the practical relationship advice, I also like the spiritual undercurrent of the book.
Rating: 2
Summary: A bit inaccurate in places
Comment: There was some insightful information in the book and, if purely used for the 'how to find a mate' program (i.e get out there, date many, dump anyone that's a dead-end quickly), it probably works.
She does have some inaccuracies in the book, though. For example, she talks about STDs, but only actually mentions AIDs (as if it was the only life-changing one). She implies that using a condom will prevent all STDs, but some of the worst STDs are not stopped by condoms! For another example, she seems to believe that the only reason a woman will stay with a loser is an 'easy to stay in' attitude, but studies have shown that when women have sex, they release a hormone called oxytocin. This makes women feel extra warm and fuzzy for their sex partners. Thus, a woman gets very attached to her sexual partner very quickly (more attached than circumstances otherwise warrant), making it difficult to realize they are in dead-end romances and then to leave them.
Finally, though this probably doesn't matter for most of her readers, this books comes from a very secular view-point. Personally, I get my self-esteem from knowing God thinking I'm beautiful and loves me. Therefore I wonder if her secular approach to increasing self-esteem really works.
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