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Lifetimes: A Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children

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Title: Lifetimes: A Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children
by Bryan Mellonie, Robert R. Ingpen
ISBN: 0-553-34023-9
Publisher: Bantam Books
Pub. Date: October, 1983
Format: Paperback
Volumes: 1
List Price(USD): $7.95
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Average Customer Rating: 4.55 (11 reviews)

Customer Reviews

Rating: 5
Summary: Lifetimes: Healing for Children and Adults
Comment: I have a fairly extensive collection of books about death and grieving for "my" children, which we have used for the loss of
family, friends and pets. But this is the only book I regularly give copies of to families. The "de-personalized" way it talks about death, the universality of its text combined with soft drawings and repetition are very soothing. This is NOT a book about emotions or stages of death. (If you are looking for one of those Everett Anderson's Goodbye is a positive place to start.)

This is a book about the rhythm of life and death for all creatures, for everything that is born. One of the best parts of the book is its emphasis on what a lifetime is, and how it is framed by birth and death, and that inbetween those "markers" is what is important. It explains that different creatures have different life spans, and that this aspect of nature is neither fair nor unfair. It simply is.

I do not restrict this book to times when a child is grieving,
I include it in our regular reading rotation, so that the children see death as a normal part of life experiences. Death is so emotionally charged, especially for the grown ups, that having a calm book is especially worthwhile. When a child is actually grieving balancing the more "intense" books with this soothing one, does wonders.

Rating: 4
Summary: Effective book for discussing physical death with a child
Comment: As a public school librarian, I would say that "Lifetimes" is an effective picture book for an adult to share with a child (or children) in dealing with the subject of death. However, as a person of faith, I would add that the scope of this book is limited to earthly life and therefore does not touch on the belief in life after death.

The text states: "Nothing that is alive goes on living for ever." This statement either reflects the authors' intent on only dealing with the concept of physical death, or it could be interpreted as their belief statement. This is why I'd suggest that "Lifetimes" be read by, or shared with, a caring adult who would be able to answer a child's questions based on a family's belief system.

Rating: 5
Summary: A defining book.
Comment: This book would be effective for grief therapy and for teaching about life cycles. It specifically answers the question: What is a lifetime?

My daughter, age 4, had a lot of questions about death. She was most especially interested in finding out when her "dying day" would be. This book seemed to help her understand that everyone's lifetime is special to them. I wanted her to understand that because someone else died it doesn't mean her death is imminent. A common fear among the young.

An exquisitely illustrated and plainly written book, it speaks clearly to the children about a complicated subject. I highly recommend it for all home and school libraries for ages three and up. It should be used as part of a comprehensive set of books on biological and familial concepts as it is not meant to answer all of a child's questions on life cycles, grief, death or dying.

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