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Title: Our Guys: The Glen Ridge Rape and the Secret Life of the Perfect Suburb by Bernard Lefkowitz ISBN: 0375702695 Publisher: Vintage Books Pub. Date: May, 1998 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $15.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.45
Rating: 5
Summary: A Tale Ironically Repeating Itself on Long Island in 2003!
Comment: This is a very worthy real as the trial begins for boys who were members of a Varsity Football Squad of a Long Island High School who allegedly "hazed" the Freshman team by sexually abusing some of them with broomksticks, pine cones and golf balls during Summer Football Camp held in Pennsylvania in August 2003. A community stands divided over the whole incident; broomsticks are being thrown at the victims in the parking lot of school; the football season was cancelled and coaches have been terminated. Yet, the healing hasn't even started. Another high school sports tragedy makes its indelible mark on the lives of many!
When high school and college sports have horror stories like the more recent one in 2003 and the earlier one, which Our Guys considers, there is something wrong! When parents and community members try to minimize it because the team's "shining lights" are involved, that's all the more tragic.
Our Guys is the true story of a young retarded woman in New Jersey who is raped by the "stars" of the town's football team. Some place in every high school curriculum, this book should be on a required reading list and it should be followed up by some serious discussion of the ethical issues presented in this true account of tragedy. If there is truth to the notion of teachable moments in life, there are many to be found in this book that could benefit every educator, student, parent and community member in this country. I would like to say that Bernard Lefkowitz did an outstanding job researching and preparing to write this compellingly true story. Six stars for Lefkowitz' courage and hard work!!! I well imagine he has received death threats as a result of this outstanding and socially significant book. As far as the reality of this documentary, it is a sad indictment of how we "talk the talk" of the ideals of secondary school athletics (and seemingly even worse, intercollegiate athletics), yet, we frequently fail to "walk the walk" to make sure that sports are complementary to the educational process and not of primary importance "in and of themselves" in an individual high school, college or community as a whole. We can look anywhere in this country -- certainly not just in New Jersey where this tragedy takes place and we can observe a twisted and sometimes seemingly pathologically sub-conscious agenda in the support of athletics. Sadly, I have witnessed this most often in the parents of athletes. At the end of this book, I couldn't help but feeling angry and sad about the whole story -- for the victim especially but also for the "star" rapists who had been misguided and used by their parents and their community. Probably more disgusting than the crime itself is the manner in which many members of this New Jersey community tried to minimize what occurred by trying to avoid facing the truth about the dangers we create in the idolization of "high school jocks". While so many efforts have been made to improve athletics in the context of academics, there are still some sports that I believe tend to ultimately endanger the physical and emotional well being of kids because of some need their schools and towns have for winning teams and high school "heroes." Typical American communities seem to have a tremendous need for winning teams -- most often in Football, increasingly Hockey and of course, Basketball. I mention these three because in my observation, they are often the sports that seem to bring out some of the worst traits in young people. In order of objectified and sanctioned "violence," I have to indict the first two, football and hockey, as among the worst. They are among the most financially costly for schools to offer and beyond the violence, seem to demand the largest slice of the athletic department's funding. From equipment, to stadiums and rinks, they also have the highest liability insurance rates -- because more kids get physically hurt participating in these two sports than in any other sports that schools can offer. These "costs" don't even measure the potential for "emotional damage" that lots of former athletes suffer after their "stardom" ends. Yes, I understand the ideals of team play, of self-discipline and all of the supposed positives of these two sports, I just don't buy it! I have observed first hand too much sanctioned violence on the field and in the stands to believe these sports stands the test of their supposed value. Most sadly, parents are often those screaming loudest for blood -- encouraging their sons and now their daughters to "hurt" the opposition. Supposedly there is no "checking" allowed in women's hockey. Watch a game; they'll take the two-minute penalty over the regulation! The more violence, the more excited the fans seem to grow -- Is this something we want to encourage in the young men and women of our society? Some parents seem to be living out their own unmet dreams for themselves now somehow attainable only through their kids' victories. And to what end? The winners get to be "untouchable stars" that basically can do no wrong. That's the case I believe Lefkowitz makes most clearly in this outrageous documentary of violence permitted because of adolescent celebrity. Yes, the perpetrator finally received some consequences but in my estimation, far too little was done, far too late! And, I wonder whether anything has changed in that town? This book is a tremendous companion to one that Buzz Bissinger wrote called "Friday Night Lights", about a town in Odessa, Texas where the entire community comes out for Football like zealots. While nothing as tragic takes place in ... Lights, as in "Our Guys", what is really clear in both books is how much we cheat kids by making them believe in themselves as "heroes" at 16, 17 and 18 years of age -- only for them yet to realize that there's lots left to learn about life and at the end of high school, the star fades when they have outlived their "usefulness" and they're just an ordinary Joe or Jane who can't figure out what happened. Too often some of these "stars" never get over it and have lots of trouble comprehending how to move on in life in a positive manner. Lefkowitz has presented an outstanding work which documents a serious issue every parent, community member and educator needs to think a lot about. Without some lessons taken from Bernard Lefkowitz' tragic story, our society will certainly continue to fail our kids in helping them to develop a healthy, realistic and balanced sense of themselves and their place and tremendous potential for the greater good of our world. Let's not lose kids in early or late adolescence to the despair many now seem to experience when they realize the sun has set on their "stardom"!
Daniel J. Maloney
Saint Paul, MN USA
Rating: 1
Summary: Not NON-Fiction
Comment: I would like to say, only believe half of what you read. This holds true with this book. Much of the information in this book is from sources biased by this incident. Take, Chuck Fig, the leading drug using source for Bernie Lefkowitz. This kid was a pathological liar with a talent for making things up. This is who Bernie relied on for his information. You've got to be joking. This book may be called non-fiction, just like the Enquirer is a periodical. Hey Bernie, if you wanted the true story, I think you should have found some better sources. And if Peggy (Leslie) was so handicapped how come she was involved with raping several kids at the schools she went to? You should stop writing such biased, interpretative, opinionated fiction and passing it off as non-fiction.
Rating: 5
Summary: Former Glen Ridge Resident
Comment: I was one of the graduating class of '99 students, exactly 10 years after the incident. Let me tell you, there are very minor mistakes in the book, this being compared to the word of mouth from teachers who told us about it that still remain at the high school. I still believe Glen Ridge pride is still existent in their sports, but majority of trophies in the school alone belong to the band. Jocks will always get the praise there because of its tradition. The town itself is very old fashion, with the gas lamps and all. I used to live on Hillside Ave., not too far from where this thing supposedly happened. I was told not to talk to reporters by our principal and what was once a great halloween tradition was now ruined because of the hype this case got. We used to be able to dress up and put on a skits for halloween, but the class of '98 put on a skit of guys beating up a girl(who was actually a guy in drag) with a bat(nothing sexual) and from then on, halloween was lame. Then they got rid of "move up mission", in which the Juniors would torture 8th graders at the end of the year, which was all in good fun because they were the new freshmen. So I had to hide when I was a freshmen but couldn't get to do it myself. What really did it for me was when they decided Bombardment(Dodgeball) was to violent and cancelled that! I was in disbelief. The school has seriously changed in the four years I was there, most drastically in my senior year. I can't say if it was for the better though. They probably have padding on the walls now or something to avoid further attention from incidents.
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