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Title: Tongue Fu! : How to Deflect, Disarm, and Defuse Any Verbal Conflict by Sam Horn ISBN: 0-312-15227-2 Publisher: St. Martin's Press Pub. Date: 15 March, 1997 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $13.95 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.55 (11 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: Most fun, useful communication book I've read in 36 yrs.
Comment: I now recommend this in my workshops as the best all-round book on communications period. It's fun, short, practical, insightful, easy to remember and useful in every challenging communication situation.
Rating: 5
Summary: everclear1
Comment: "I wish I'd been introduced to these ideas years ago; they would have saved me so much unnecessary grief. As the author points out, this isn't just about dealing with difficult people. It's about communicating in a way that helps us get along better with just about anyone. I didn't even know there were such things as "Words to Lose," and now I realize I use them constantly with customers and co-workers, even my kids. No wonder people sometimes give me a hard time. I was using language that actually makes matters worse. The book tells you exactly what to say in different types of situations. Best of all, it made me think twice about the way I relate to people. Instead of seeing the other person as the one who is being ornery, I realize now that I could be contributing to it. This book is a real eye-opener and I'm glad I read it.
Rating: 1
Summary: Sophmoric Infomercial
Comment: I purchased this book based upon many of the reader recommendations on this very important subject. However, after I received the book and began reading it, I felt scammed.
Recently at work, I felt I could have handled a situation better than I did. I knew what I wanted to convey, but it came out unsatisfactorly. Being someone who wants to improve themself, I thought I'd get a book relating to this subject matter.
The techniques presented in this book are inapplicable and irrelevant - they don't provide insight, and in my opinion are rediculous - the point where I found myself laughing. Reading this book felt like you were being lectured by your clueless, happy-go-lucky aunt.
Techniques such as "if you can't beat 'em, join 'em", "handle hassles with fun", and saying "you're right" (and meaning it) when people complain, are not realistic techniques to addressing real problem. The one which put me over the edge is her bit "choose to be compassionate" when people fail to meet their most basic responsibilities. According to this technique, if you are in a line at some place of business, and there are 25 people in front of you and one employee, you are supposed to spend the time in line convincing yourself that "it's okay - they are just understaffed". Or, if that employee messes up your order, say an ice cream cone, you are supposed to do the following:
1. "Ask them for their name" - Everyone knows doing this will immediately put the employee on the defensive.
2. "State your Customer Rights and Wishes" - This is going to anger the employee with such a belittling remark.
3. "Ask to see a supervisor" - Oh, really? Gee, I'm glad I'm paying money for such earth shattering advice.
And so on...
In all seriousness, my conclusion is that this book will not help you to address real problems, especially in the business environment. I strongly urge you to avoid it. I have since begun reading the book "The Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defense at Work". Although I have not drawn any conclusions, I will tell you that this book takes a serious approach to the issues at hand and uses scientific research to support its conjectures. By the way, Tongue Fu doesn't even have a footnote in it.
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Title: Take the Bully by the Horns: Stop Unethical, Uncooperative, or Unpleasant People from Running and Ruining Your Life by Sam Horn ISBN: 0312278209 Publisher: St. Martin's Press Pub. Date: 12 September, 2002 List Price(USD): $23.95 |
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Title: What's Holding You Back? : 30 Days to Having the Courage and Confidence to Do What You Want, Meet Whom You Want, and Go Where You Want by Sam Horn ISBN: 0312254407 Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin Pub. Date: 10 March, 2000 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: Verbal Judo by George Thompson ISBN: 0688137865 Publisher: Quill Pub. Date: 28 October, 1994 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: The GENTLE ART OF VERBAL SELF-DEFENSE 2ND EDITION by Suzette Haden Elgin ISBN: 0735200890 Publisher: Prentice Hall Press Pub. Date: 19 January, 2000 List Price(USD): $16.00 |
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Title: ConZentrate : Get Focused and Pay Attention--When Life Is Filled with Pressures, Distractions, and Multiple Priorities by Sam Horn ISBN: 0312270100 Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin Pub. Date: 06 February, 2001 List Price(USD): $13.95 |
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