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Title: The Enneagram in Love and Work : Understanding Your Intimate and Business Relationships by Helen Palmer ISBN: 0-06-250721-4 Publisher: Harper SanFrancisco Pub. Date: 19 January, 1996 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $15.95 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.25 (16 reviews)
Rating: 4
Summary: The Enneagram in Love & Work: Insightful and Fun.... BUT....
Comment: Helen Palmer is widely viewed as one of the foremost experts on the "modern" enneagram, and her books are regarded by many as "standard" references on this system of personality typing, psychology, spirituality and self-growth. As a long-time student of the enneagram, I find that I often reach for one of her books when I have a question.
In this book, Palmer offers only the briefest of introductions to the historical background of the enneagram, and then goes on to in-depth descriptions of each of the nine enneatypes. For each type, she covers the basic personality traits, biases and preoccupations, as well briefly addressing the three "instinctual variants" found within each. She then proceeds to describe each type "in love" and "at work." In terms of love, these descriptions attempt to explain what it is like to "live with" each type, as well as that type's orientation towards intimacy and the "signals" (positive AND negative) they send to their intimate surroundings. In the "work" contexts, Palmer covers work styles, leadership styles, teamwork and areas of conflict. Overall, I found the descriptions to be quite accurate, and I gained some new insights into why people in my life behave the way they do.
The most useful part of the book is the third section, the "Directory of Relationships." This is basically a "matrix" of descriptions outlining how any given type is likely to interact with any other type. For each combination (for example, "four with nine") there is a brief description of the dynamic that might exist in a love relationship, as well as the dynamic of a boss/employee work relationship. The book is worth buying for this section, alone.
There is no "quiz" or "self test" in this book to help readers determine their enneagram type, so it is definitely beneficial to know your enneatype before starting-- otherwise be prepared to spend some time reading the different type descriptions before you can really gain much benefit from the relationship/work focus of the book's content.
I do have a few "niggles" with "The Enneagram in Love & Work;" some of which have already been touched on by prior reviewers. Palmer seems to have a somewhat uneven knowledge of each of the nine enneagram types. In spite of her "expert status," I give her the benefit of the doubtm as this is possibly a reflection that she's a follower of the "oral tradition" of the enneagram-- which revolves around learning from each type as they talk about their lives. The shortcoming of this system is that certain personality types are DRAWN to psychology workshops (thus offering a greater wealth of knowledge) while other types would have little interest in such things, thus resulting in underrepresentation and limited information. In general, though, Palmer offers many more accurate insights than questionable ones.
Another (very minor) problem I have is that Palmer starts the book by outlining the enneagram from a spiritual path perspective, setting the scene from the Bible's "Seven deadly sins" (Plus two others, which I am never quite sure where come from!), yet the entire book is basically focused on "personality type psychology." Given the body of work presented here, I think she would have done well to have provided more psychological perspectives in the introduction-- surprising, in a way, given that Helen Palmer is a practicing psychotherapist.
Final Thoughts: Recommended (8 out of possible 10 bookmarks); Palmer does a fair job of taking on the topic relationships between enneagram types, but at the end I still find myself thinking that "there's really more to it than this." This is perhaps not the most useful book for someone who's just starting out, but definitely a useful (and fun) reference for a person with some basic knowledge of the enneagram, or psychological type, in general.
Thanks for reading!
--Peter
Rating: 2
Summary: Some nuggets, but you have to dig
Comment: This is Helen Palmer's second book, and a bit disappointing. The information here is somewhat better than her first book as one would hope, but "Love and Work" is poorly written, even ungrammatical. The combinations of the different enneagram points in relationship is the best part of the book, but these descriptions seem uneven and undeveloped. Some of the relationships described sounded more accurate than others. This book could have been really interesting, but I found it unsatisfying.
Rating: 5
Summary: I was astounded...
Comment: I borrowed this book from an instructor who was teaching the Enneagram to a small group of interested people. When I read the chapter on 4's I was amazed at the accuracy of the personality "type" to my own. It felt as if a clinical psychologist had followed me though my emotional and traumatic years and recorded all of my triumphs and tribulations in a concise, analytical manner. Better still, it explained why my instincts to react were so different from those around me. I learned to see that people have very different motivations than my own which meant that I needed to realize that I could not change them but I could now appreciate why they saw things in other ways.
As an added benefit I learned to understand (and accept) more about myself through Helen Palmer's book than I had through many years of professional psychogical therapy. Wish I had this knowledge 20 years ago. It would have saved me a lot of money.
The sheer simplicity of the book lends itself to the everyday language in which it was written. There is none of the false pretentiousness present in many of the books that share similar self-help messages. However, it does not feel as if it were written to stoop to the lowest common denominator either.
It should be noted that Palmer emphatically states that no-one should presume to "type" others as a method in which to judge what personality is most compatible to one's own purpose. As with any personality profiling there is the inevitable dilution of the original message that leads to generalizations and oversimplification.
My personal assessment is that the book is an easy and fascinating read for anyone wishing to better understand human behavior and interactions. I highly and heartily recommend it.
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Title: The Wisdom of the Enneagram : The Complete Guide to Psychological and Spiritual Growth for the Nine Personality Types by DON RICHARD RISO, RUSS HUDSON ISBN: 0553378201 Publisher: Bantam Pub. Date: 15 June, 1999 List Price(USD): $20.00 |
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Title: The Enneagram: Understanding Yourself and the Others In Your Life by Helen Palmer ISBN: 0062506838 Publisher: Harper SanFrancisco Pub. Date: 12 April, 1991 List Price(USD): $16.95 |
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Title: The Essential Enneagram: The Definitive Personality Test and Self-Discovery Guide by David N. Daniels, Virginia A. Price ISBN: 0062516760 Publisher: Harper SanFrancisco Pub. Date: 30 May, 2000 List Price(USD): $10.00 |
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Title: Personality Types : Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery by Don Richard Riso, Russ Hudson ISBN: 0395798671 Publisher: Mariner Books Pub. Date: 29 October, 1996 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram: Nine Faces of the Soul by Sandra Maitri, Geneen Roth ISBN: 1585420816 Publisher: J. P. Tarcher Pub. Date: 15 February, 2001 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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