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Title: Parenting With Grace: Catholic Parent's Guide to Raising Almost Perfect Kids by Gregory K. Popcak ISBN: 0-87973-730-1 Publisher: Our Sunday Visitor Pub. Date: 01 December, 1999 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
Average Customer Rating: 4.6 (10 reviews)
Rating: 5
Summary: Should be required reading for every parent
Comment: Whether you're Catholic or not, if you are a parent you will benefit tremendously from this book. I'm a Catholic parent and I'm really thankful that someone took the time and trouble to organize the vast plethora of parenting techniques out there so that it is easy to see their place within the structure of a Catholic parenting paradigm. The author is very knowledgeable of both scripture and church doctrine and explains their relevance to raising children. The step by step techniques for dealing with the various stages of a person's maturation are excellent. He also has little quizzes that you can use to help elucidate the areas where your parent-child relationship may need help. He has a superb treatise on why spanking is not a suitable discipline technique. I can't say enough about the excellent blend of philosophy, practical application and religion that the author has put together in this book. He is an organizational genius. Read this book!
Rating: 5
Summary: Wonderful resource
Comment: This book is wonderful. Although it is a Catholic book, and is written from a Catholic perspective (which, being Catholic, made me love the book even more!), the book provides a philosophy of parenting that would benefit ALL children. This book supported a lot of what I felt in my heart was the right way to parent and provided a LOT more information to more effectively raise my children. It describes the childhood I wish I had had! Loving, yet firm. I plan on buying it for new parents-to-be, so they can read and learn from the book BEFORE the children arrive.
Rating: 3
Summary: Practical book but I had serious reservations
Comment: First the positive.....there were elements presented that I really enjoyed and found helpful being that I already practice a more positive discipline approach. The chapter on "Everyday Discipline That Makes a Difference" based on educating the child in virtue and building relationships was very good. I appreciate the concrete examples in illustrating a particular point; in parenting books, this is most helpful. And as a practicing Catholic, it was nice to read a parenting book that included words from the Holy Father. I also liked the Family Mission Statement idea in order to help foster the virtues (which don't get a lot of space in any parenting book) in our children.
However, as I was reading the book, there were several sections that were particularly unsettling and I found that unless one is already naturally bent toward attachment parenting (or possibly latently), this book may prove a bit disconcerting. Understandibly, most parenting books claim to be the "preferred" way to parenting but this book, to me, goes beyond that because of the theological claims it seems to make.
I found the following paragraph troubling....
"Lisa and I are not so foolish as to think that the methods we present are the only ways to parent. But it is our opinion that the methods we describe represent an invitation to enjoy "the next level" of parenting.....Just as other Christian denominations possess some truth, but the Catholic Church has "the fullness of truth" other parents are capable of having good relationships with their children, but we believe the parents who avail themselves of the parenting style we present here are capable of entering into the 'fullness of family life'."(pg. 137)
It is obvious to anyone that there is not only one way to parent but I found it interesting that the authors left out any words from that sentence which would imply other parenting methods as also being **good and effective** in imparting Christian virtues and raising holy children. On the contrary, from the remaining sentences they instead strongly imply that anyone who chooses not to follow their method of parenting are falling short on "the fullness of family life" and are parenting on a "lower level". There is no Church authority or teaching that backs up such a claim and I find it unsettling that they took it upon themselves to assume it. I must admit, my impressions of the book were a bit marred from then on.
Further on, the authors then strongly imply that unless one is practicing attachment parenting and the style chosen by the authors, one is failing to love their children with as much generosity as they. Quoting from the book: "As the parable of the ungrateful servant teaches, God calls us to model the same generosity He shows to us. Yes, it would be enough to be a good, loving conventional parent. But by God's own example, Catholic Christians are called to be more than "enough". We are called to be "perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect". That is, perfect in love."(pg.162) Isn't this similar to saying that if we don't all give up everything we own and go to India to serve the poor as Mother Teresa did we aren't being generous enough. Personal holiness or "perfection" is not confined to any method of parenting any more than it is to a particular vocation, career, spirituality, or devotion. To a Catholic, being perfected in love consists in lovingly and generously doing the will of God, and God's will varies for each individual. Perfection in generosity does not consist in how long one nurses a child, whether or not one has a family bed or wears a sling.
Athough the book has some good practical tips for any parent, especially for those who already espouse attachment parenting, I respectfully disagree with their extraneous theological assertions. I also was turned off completely by the arrogant (for lack of a better word) undertones.
I would also recommend the authors to read "Story of a Family" to see how the parents, who themselves are up for canonization, raised the greatest saint of modern times. It's interesting to note that they were a dual-income family, complete with servants, who sent their children to boarding school. (St. Therese was sent away to live with a wet nurse for several months b/c of health problems). Recently canonized St. Gianna Beretta Molla was a physician so it seems highly unlikely that she practiced attachment parenting either
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Title: For Better...Forever!: A Catholic Guide to Lifelong Marriage by Gregory K. Popcak ISBN: 0879736887 Publisher: Our Sunday Visitor Pub. Date: 01 March, 1999 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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Title: Guiding Your Catholic Preschooler by Kathy Pierce, Lori Rowland ISBN: 0879733926 Publisher: Our Sunday Visitor Pub. Date: 01 September, 2001 List Price(USD): $5.95 |
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Title: The Exceptional Seven Percent: The Nine Secrets of the Worlds Happiest Couples by Gregory K., Msw Popcak ISBN: 0806523581 Publisher: Citadel Press Pub. Date: 01 August, 2002 List Price(USD): $14.95 |
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Title: Discipline That Lasts a Lifetime: The Best Gift You Can Give Your Kids by Raymond N. Guarendi, Ray Guarendi ISBN: 1569553688 Publisher: Charis Books Pub. Date: 01 April, 2003 List Price(USD): $10.99 |
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Title: Beyond the Birds and the Bees by Gregory K. Popcak ISBN: 087973941X Publisher: Our Sunday Visitor Pub. Date: 01 September, 2001 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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