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Title: Why There Are No Good Men Left : The Romantic Plight of the New Single Woman by Barbara Dafoe Whitehead ISBN: 0-7679-0640-3 Publisher: Broadway Pub. Date: 30 December, 2003 Format: Paperback Volumes: 1 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
Average Customer Rating: 2.85 (34 reviews)
Rating: 2
Summary: Femminist Backlash
Comment: I do not disagree with Whitehead that the search for a mate is a difficult one. Both men and women have grown accustomed to the sexual freedom that entitles us to all of the physical benefits of marriage without any of the committments. There is therefore less incentive to "rush" in to marriage, especially since women now spend much more time educating themselves and preparing themselves for life-long careers. This is in large part responsible for the fact that more men than ever seem afraid of committment. As the old saying goes, "why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?"
What then are the alternatives for women? Are we supposed to get married to the first man who asks and who is decent just so we can avoid this connundrum if and when we reach our thirties as singles? (Even though we might not be ready for such a committment in our twenties and even if he is not the right man for us?) Are we to forgo the financial freedom that an advanced degree can bring so we can tether ourselves to a home and children before we are ready and before we have experienced life for ourselves? What then is the purpose of a woman's life? To sit around and wait for her knight in shining armor to show up? Are we to be chastised as selfish for wanting to expand our minds and be free with our time and money while we still can, before children and husbands relegate our needs to the bottom of the pile? As a law student I know first hand how a women without any assets or a career of her own will fare during a divorce proceeding, and it's not pretty.
Men have for years enjoyed a period of freedom before settling down in to married life with one woman. I have never once spoken with a woman who said that she wishes she had married younger, or she had decided to give up a career or higher education so that she could spend her time trying to find a mate. It is sad that it is so difficult for intelligent, attractive women to find equally accomplished men. But perhaps the real problem is that men need to realize that unless they make family a priority and treat women with the respect and honesty they deserve, all of the good women will be taken soon as well.
The last thing our society needs is yet another book that delineates the "problems" of single women while offering no solutions. We need more men who aren't afraid of marriage and commitment, and fewer women from Whitehead's generation making younger women panic about the scarcity of men.
Women can rest assured that if they pursue their dreams and their passions, they will have a fulfilling and meaningful life, whether or not Mr. Right shows up along the way.
Rating: 5
Summary: A HISTORIC BOOK!
Comment: Reviewers who criticize this book as lacking useful advice for women or overly blaming men are missing the point: It's a fascinating snapshot into the minds of modern American women and the author herself as well as an indication of the changes for society ahead. If you want to save yourself a read, here's a quick summation: Successful, attractive, demanding, self-centered and aging women seem to have a hard time finding a successful man willing to give up his own carefree life to settle down with an old maid such as herself AND they can't seem to figure out why or what do to about it! It's an unintentional black comedy that will leave people in the know laughing and everyone else will have a hard time putting it down. I can't resist putting my own 2 cents into the issues the book raises and say that it's clear these women, indeed society, need to ask what's more important to women: Money and power or romance and love. To the women in the book, the answer is quite clear but that doesn't stop them from complaining about it and making fools of themselves. Grab some popcorn and enjoy.
Rating: 1
Summary: men should not be swindled into marrying these women
Comment: A decent woman would've been married before she reaches her late 20's. Those who stay single till their late 20's and early 30's are the ones who want to play the world and enjoy their SEXUAL freedom. There is nothing wrong with that, except that they should know what they are getting into. Don't let their whining muddle your intellect. I am greatly dismayed at the loser men who end up marrying these women. Men should let these women stay free and pursue their liberty and possibly rot in their 40's and 50's. It's only fair.
These educated, single women all share one trait, that they choose badly. It's a reflection of her bad taste and poor judgement. However can a man be happy if he marries a woman of poor taste/judgement? In my experience, I've found the educated women much dumber than the ones who didn't go to college but chose to work. Yes, these female bimbos can recite poetry, write computer programs, or spit half-intelligent business reports better than the less educated do. But they are more susceptible to swindling by certain type of men. In short, the educated women are only half-good at judging their respective fields but poor judge of a man's character and life in general. Why should a man marry such an imbecile?
Now if you ask me if I want to pick up the bill of supporting her life after she's through a few men of questionable qualities, of course NO. Men should read H.L. Mencken's "In Defense of Women" and figure out for themselves whether they want to marry and if so what kind of women to marry.
I'd say, keep up your vigilence and don't get swindled. Keep your mind clear and don't left soft feeling ruin your life. Read Aristotle if you want to find out what a happy life means.
Good luck.
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Title: The Divorce Culture : Rethinking Our Commitments to Marriage and Family by Barbara Dafoe Whitehead ISBN: 0679751688 Publisher: Vintage Pub. Date: 03 February, 1998 List Price(USD): $14.00 |
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Title: The Hidden Mission Field: Caring for Single Parent Families in by Theresa McKenna ISBN: 1579211712 Publisher: WinePress Publishing Pub. Date: 01 January, 1999 List Price(USD): $12.95 |
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Title: The Overload Syndrome: Learning to Live Within Your Limits by Richard A. Swenson, Richard A. Swenson M.D. ISBN: 1576831310 Publisher: Navpress Pub. Date: December, 1999 List Price(USD): $13.00 |
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Title: Normal Family Processes, Third Edition: Growing Diversity and Complexity by Froma Walsh ISBN: 1572308168 Publisher: Guilford Press Pub. Date: 20 December, 2002 List Price(USD): $60.00 |
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Title: The Graying of the Flock: A New Model for Ministry by James L. Knapp ISBN: 0971428980 Publisher: New Leaf Books Pub. Date: 01 February, 2003 List Price(USD): $10.95 |
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