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The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships

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Title: The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
by Harriet Lerner
ISBN: 0-06-091565-X
Publisher: Quill
Pub. Date: 1997
Format: Paperback
Volumes: 1
List Price(USD): $14.00
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Average Customer Rating: 4.71 (49 reviews)

Customer Reviews

Rating: 5
Summary: This book about your mind can help your health.
Comment: Two weeks ago, someone handed me this book and said "Please review this - it's really helped my fibromyalgia and my friend's high blood pressure".

Though that was not what Harriet Lerner had in mind when she wrote The Dance of Anger, this book should be a manual for women with chronic and auto-immune conditions. In these types of conditions, there is often an emotional component triggered by a situation in which we feel powerless or unable to effectively communicate. Women either through conditioning or habit tend to react with anger or tears of frustration. Nothing is resolved. Harriet Lerner offers an alternative solution.

The major point that Harriet Lerner resoundedly drives home is that we will not change the other person, but we can change how we interact with them. We can break this cycle or dance by learning new steps. Thus, The Dance of Anger is about communication. It points out non-effective communication patterns and how to change them to become effective. This book about your mind - can help your health.

Dr. Suzanne Lawton

Rating: 5
Summary: A woman trying to deal with midlife
Comment: As a person dealing with menopause and my husband's midlife crisis, I wanted to learn more about myself. How am I contributing to the disintegration of my marriage was an important question for me since I didn't want another relationship until I understood what was happening in this one. I discovered patterns of my own overfunctioning, blaming and pursuing which I am breaking to change my behavior. This book has helped me to let go of my guilt feelings about wanting change, and to appreciate the needs of my children and husband. I have learned that pain and suffering translate to growth. Anger is a part of the process and a healthy one. I don't know if I will be able to save my present relationship, but having read this book, I know that I won't repeat unhealthy behaviors in another relationship.

Rating: 5
Summary: Changed my life
Comment: This book had a significant impact on who I am today: a more self confident person who understands that the only person truly in control of my life is: ME!

I love the examples of how to handle conflict situations, as for those of us who grew up without a good example, knowing that we don't deal with situations appropriately is not so helpful if we don't get clues on how to improve.

A friend recommended the book and I have given it to friends since. Read this book if you are not afraid of change, as change is required. Change to be a happier person.

I have read a lot of psychology books, this one is right to the point and spoke my language. It gave me hope and the tools to make my life better.

Similar Books:

Title: The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships
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Title: The Dance of Connection: How to Talk to Someone When You're Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed, or Desperate
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Title: The Mother Dance: How Children Change Your Life
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